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The Feminine Way

It's fairly common for women to outnumber men in yoga classes these days, yet when we look to the beginnings of yoga we find that women were absent from the world of yoga. Krishnamacharya, fearing that yoga would die out if left to the men who had business on their mind more than the practice of yoga, was one of the first Indians to teach women yoga.

Not that long ago, I found myself in an interesting position -- I was studying the style of yoga that I had always longed to, yet I was extremely unhappy. One of the reasons my dissatisfaction lied in the complete absence of the feminine in the training. By feminine I don't mean female teachers. Rather, I mean the qualities of the feminine -- connection, receptivity, fluidity, non-linear thinking/behavior.

This is not to say that structure, logic, goal-oriented behavior, and linear-thinking are bad. I was just feeling that there was no balance between the two. There were times I wanted to focus on being as opposed to doing. Needless to say, that wasn't the way of this training. After having my fill of rigidity, I left the training. After making the decision to leave, I felt such a sense of lightness in my body. It was if my whole body sighed with relief.

This was a great lesson for me in regards to my yoga practice. It wasn't uncommon for me to approach my practice in a masculine way -- I focused a lot on doing, achieving certain goals (I wanted to gain more flexibility or master this pose or that pose). My breath would sometimes be forced or get stuck in my body. My disenchantment with the training was a lightbulb moment for me in regards to my yoga practice -- it was time to balance out the masculine in my practice with a little feminine.

Years ago, I took my first Yin Yoga class and loved the way it balanced out my more rigorous every day practice (back then I did a lot of power vinyasa yoga). It never ocurred to me that I could actually balance out my practice without alternating Yin Yoga with my regular style of yoga -- I could actually balance it out within my current practice. Eureka!

Here are some of the ways in which I incorporate more of the feminine into my practice to maintain a more healthy balance:

I begin my practice with movement. Before I step onto my mat, I take anywhere from 5-15 minutes to shake, vibrate, and/or connect to my inner serpent (lots of spine movements like Spinal Rocking or Cat Cow or Rolling Cobra). Rather than choose a goal for my practice (i.e. achieve a certain pose or increase flexibility or wind down or energize or build up to a more difficult pose) I practice for the sake of practicing. I "take my eye off the prize" and focus instead on noticing what's happening in my body during the practice. I focus on how each pose feels in my body. My goal becomes being more receptive to what yoga has to offer me rather than impose a goal on myself and my practice.I maintain fluidity either with my breath and/or with some added movement (favoring dynamic poses over static poses). For example -- rather than come up into Warrior and hold the pose, I'll do a dynamic Warrior, in which I come up into the pose and go out of it a few times. If I choose to focus on keeping my breath fluid, then I back off when I notice my breath becoming choppy or irregular or forced. I'll go gently into a pose and only until after I'm sure that my breath is fluid will I go a little deeper.Surrender becomes the name of the game. Typically, people associate Savasana with surrender in a yoga practice. It is, after all, the pose in which we are supposed to let go and allow everything we've done on the mat to integrate. While I do enjoy my Savasana (even when there are days I'm tempted to skip it, I don't), I also focus on surrendering into each pose that I move into. If I'm struggling or fighting or working too hard in a pose, I back off, breathe deeper and surrender a little more. It's the difference between you coming into a pose and the pose coming into you. It's a subtle shift into allowing the pose to inhabit your body rather than forcing your body to inhabit the pose. I will often ask myself, can I surrender more in this pose?Sometimes I even activate my pelvis a little more than usual during my practice by adding in hip circles in a lunge or I'll come to my knees in plank and do some hip circles all the way around into Upward Dog.

I notice that when I maintain this masucline/feminine balance, my body feels happier. It doesn't matter whether you're a man or a woman, the idea of balancing the two energies still applies.

Some of my more favorite teachers who incorporate a little more of the feminine into their teaching of yoga include:

Angela Farmer

Angela is a unique and beautiful spirit and I've never worked with a teacher quite like her. Here are some of my favorite DVDs from Angela (all are on her Web site while some can be found in the Amazon Marketplace):

The Feminine Unfolding

Inner Body Flow

Shiva Rea

Shiva's energy is so...special. I remember taking a workshop with her years ago at a conference. I had just come from a wonderful class with another popular teacher, but when I walked into Shiva's class -- BAM -- I was struck by the complete change in tenor of the room. The whole workshop was a delight. While I tend to favor learning from Shiva live and in-person, here are a few of my favorite DVDs from her:

Yoga Shakti

Yogini

Yoga Trance Dance

Fluid Power

Radiant Heart Yoga

Free Flow Vinyasa

And, no, it's not a requirement to be female in order to embrace the feminine side of yoga. Take Mark Whitwell, for example. I'd have to say that bar none, he is my favorite yoga teacher right now. Whenever I have the opportunity to practice with Mark, I take it. I love his style, his philosophy, his teachings. If you haven't had the chance to experience Mark, I highly recommend any of the following DVDs:

Yoga of Heart

Real Yoga for Real People

Eoin Finn is another male teacher that I really enjoy. His latest DVD collection -- The Blissology Project -- consists of a yoga and meditation practice for every day of the week. The production quality of this DVD (which you can also download) is just beautiful. Eoin has a great style -- very chill and fluid. He's like a cold glass of lemonade on a scorcer of a day. Learn more about his new DVD set here:

The Blissology Project

There have definitely been many instances in my life where I forge ahead without considering a balance between doing and being. Living in an achievement-oriented society, it's an easy trap to fall into. Yes, there are times when masculine qualities serve me but I notice that I often get burned out when I don't balance out the masculinity with the feminine. Same goes for my yoga practice.

May you be balanced, happy, and free from suffering!

Namaste!

View the original article here

If That's Right, Then I Wanna Be Wrong

WARNING: This post is filled with the rantings of an oversensitive yoga girl living in a sometimes insensitive world.

Maybe it's the well over a decade in the world of all things yoga and meditation, but it's common for me to work the yoga lexicon. Sometimes I forget that not everyone has spent time (some not even 10 minutes much less over 10 years) in the yoga world and I find that my yoga girl speak sometimes raises a few eyebrows. Maybe that's why I laughed out loud when I read Alex Smith's funny (and, at certain points, dead-on) article, Dating a Yoga Goddess. Ah, yes, friend/mate/partner/family member beware: we yoga folk can be a bit different.

Not too long ago, I went to someone's house with a friend. My friend is related to the people we were visiting. Our time at the house was spent sitting on couches facing the TV -- which was on. Personally, I find the TV a distraction when I'm trying to have a conversation with someone. I also find myself disgusted by my own zombie-like draw to the TV -- even when I don't care what's on the screen, I find myself staring at it blankly, while half-listening to the other person. At one point, the host, who was telling me a story, broke off in mid-sentence to comment on something that was happening on TV.

Being different and all, I found myself feeling a bit hurt by this (there's more to this story than I'm telling here -- my hurt was compounded when my friend accused me of being impolite when I spent too much time with the couple's 4-year-old child). I understand that today's world is filled with multi-tasking and that it's common for people to spend time with people in front of TVs, while texting etc. That said, it still saddens me when I see a group of people out together with each person on his/her phone (either texting or talking). Attempting to converse with people while the TV is on (or while texting), or labeling simultaneous TV watching and talking as "quality time" doesn't do it for me.

WARNING: I'm about to pull from the yoga lexicon. Wait for it...

Where's the presence? I'm having a conversation with you and you're half watching the TV and half talking to me? Call me freaky yoga girl, but that equals zero presence, not a whole heck of a lot of resepect and a serious lack of connection. Now I'm going to go out on a veeeery shaky limb and say this: my idea of relationship (or relating on any level) is presence and connection. If those two key ingredients are missing, I'd say that the relationship is on shaky ground.

After mentioning my displeasure with our visit, my friend chided me by saying: "This is how we do things. We're a TV family." Ah, I love that justification. This is how we've always done things, this is how everyone does things, so it MUST be right, why change now -- blah, blah, blaaaahhhh. I fully understand that this is how things are "typically" done. If Gandhi or Jesus or Mother Teresa or anyone else who's made history had done things the way they were typically done then history wouldn't have been made and people's lives wouldn't have been irrevocably changed for the better. But what do I know --  these are just the rantings of a weird yoga girl.

This past summer, I wrote a blog post about yoga studio pet peeves and I was horrified by what happens in yoga class. Answering iPhones in class (the teacher AND the students), texting while in Downward Dog, packing up and leaving during Savasana -- yoga requires attention, not multi-tasking. Citta vritti nirodha, people!!!!!!

As you may have gathered, I'm a bit sensitive about this topic, as I've caught lots o' flack for being "different" (I'm being kind when I use this word -- usually I hear the word "weird"). [In fact, my friend will undoubtedly read this post and get seriously annoyed with me.] Call me crazy, but I'd bet that back in the late 1800s people thought that Gandhi was weird. It's possible that all of his non-violence babble and hunger strike efforts were a bit...odd, unconventional, and weird. And Jesus -- well, heck, he must have gotten quite a few odd looks what with all of the wine-drinking (after turning water into said wine) with his 12 male friends. Suffice to say, I think weird is a matter of perspective.

Perhaps that's why I don't mind letting my yoga freak flag fly. This can make me...misunderstood at best and unpopular at worst (can you hear it now -- "Ugh, Diane is coming over, so we have to turn off the TV. She's probably one of those anti-TV freaks. I just want to check the score of the game, what's wrong with that?!?!"). Yes, if this were a demented children's book, the title would be: You're Different and That's Bad.

For the record: No, I do not dine at a person's house only to lecture my host about the treatment of the animal that's being served on the table for dinner. No, I don't break out into spontaneous OMs or suggest that we have a fireside chant after dinner. No, I don't lecture people on the benefits of yoga and make them feel bad if they don't practice. I realize that my habits/belief aren't "the norm." I guess my question is this -- does this mean that the norm, while the accepted way of doing things, is necessarily the "right" way (or the only way, for that matter)?

Yes, I pass on the meat being served at dinner. Yes, I don't drink alcohol (a personal preference, NOT some sort of social statement). Yes, I have been known to go on silent retreats in which all day is spent in silence, with no reading, writing, or listening to one's iPod. Yes, I'd rather spend time in silence than with the TV on. Yes, I spend a little more money buying organic food. This doesn't make me right but I don't think it qualifies me as a card-carrying weirdo either.

Such as the road of someone who cares about something as weird as presence in an exchange or a relationship. Maybe that's why I have this total obsession (I have iTunes programmed to replay it in an endless loop) with Pink's new song, Raise Your Glass. If you were in the Philadelphia airport a few weeks back, that was me with the iPod dancing her way through the terminal. There she goes again -- freaky yoga girl.

So to my friend and all of the others who do things the typical way -- no worries. Live and be happy. I'm certainly not right and you're not wrong. There is no better or best. Just think before you use the word "weird" again, ok?

And for my fellow "weirdos" out there who are choosing to be, as Pink says, wrong in all the right ways -- this dance is for you:

Namaste!

View the original article here

Fire Starter: Heating Up with a Fiery Yoga Practice

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December 08, 2010Fire Starter: Heating Up with a Fiery Yoga Practice

One of my favorite things about winter time is a true simple pleasure -- a fire in the fireplace. Cozying up in front of a warm fire (preferably while bundled in fleece) just feels so good (gee, can you tell that I like being warm?!?!). That's one way to keep warm during the chilly winter months. But what do you do when you want to stoke your internal fire?

Those chilly mornings I make my way to my home studio, I'm usually feeling a little sleepy, a little chilly, and in desperate need of warmth and energy. I get on my mat and light my fire with this simple practice:

I start with 1-2 minutes of belly breathing (while seated).I then alternate3 rounds of Kapalabhati (first round 25 pumps, second round 35 pumps, third round 50 pumps) with 10 belly breaths.I come onto all fours and do some gentle rounds of Cat Cow.I then come to standing (I usually rag doll up slowly), inhale my arms up overhead on the inhale, join the palms at the top of the inhale and lower my joined palms on the exhale. When my pressed palms are at chest level, I press the palms together strongly for a count of 12. Repeat 3 times.I then move into some warming Sun Salutations (3-5 depending upon my mood) with a few modifications: after coming into lunge, I do 6 alternating lunge jumps. When I come into Plank, I do Breath of Fire for 30 seconds (you can modify this by coming to your knees). When I come into Downward Dog, I do alternating leg lifts (6 on each side). I then come into Horse Stance. I clasp my hands together, palms together fingers interlaced. I staighten my arms out in front of me and inhale my clasped hands above my head. On the exhale I chant RAM while bringing my arms down in a chopping motion. I repeat 11 times.I lower my arms, gently straighten my legs and walk my feet together and rest in Mountain Pose for 30-60 seconds.I then inhale my arms up, exhale into Standing Forward Bend and walk my feet back into Downward Dog. I stay in Downward Dog for a minute of so while chanting HA repeatedly (at a rapid pace).I then come to seated and make fists with thumbs inside and do alternate punches with Breath of Fire. I then do 6 rounds of inhaling through the nose and exhaling through the mouth while opening the eyes and mouth wide, letting the  tongue extend out as far as possible with a gentle haaaa sound (think Lion's Breath). I finish with 12 rounds of inhaling through curled tongue and exhaling through the nose (while keeping the curled tongue extended.

By the time I'm done, I'm feeling warm, energized, and ready to face the day. Here's to stoking your inner fire.

Namaste!

 

December 08, 2010 | Permalink

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Something to Ponder: How Do You See Yoga?

Everything Yoga: Something to Ponder: How Do You See Yoga?Everything YogaHomeArchivesSubscribeUseful LinksGet to Know the YogiHighly RecommendedResourcesServices -- Be Well Yoga TherapyThe Everything Yoga Blog StoreVideosWake Up & Join Living Yoga -- It's Free!Join the Living Yoga List & Get a Free Gift!As a subscriber of the Living Yoga list, you'll get ongoing access to free ebooks, special yoga-related offers, and special goodies to help you live your yoga and a happier, healthier life. When you sign up, you'll get a free ebook.Your First Name:Your Last Name:Your E-Mail:

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December 05, 2010Something to Ponder: How Do You See Yoga?

In her book, The Subtle Body: The Story of Yoga in America, author Stefanie Syman claims that people tend to project their own stuff onto yoga: "Yoga is like a Rorschach test: Students and teachers see in it the content of their own mind, their fantasies, and desires."

Hmmmm...interesting, indeed. Can't the same be said for life? After all, we're all looking at life, circumstances, people through our own filter (which is made up of our memories, experiences, education, beliefs, influences). Why wouldn't the same be said for yoga? I find it ironic because one of the reasons I practice yoga is to dilute the filter so that I can see the truth of things rather than the truth as I see it.

Sometimes I like to joke that I am a "recovering yogi." I certainly spent some years buying into my own beliefs and perceptions about yoga. I cared more about my form in asana rather than my experience in asana. I believed that listening to a yoga teacher was better than listening to my body. I tricked myself into thinking that my practice wasn't ego-driven even though I cared about which poses I could execute (and how perfectly).

After realizing that my yoga practice was a mirror for my life, I started to see that I wasn't quite practicing yoga -- I was merely practicing what I thought was yoga. Even now, I like to take a few steps back from yoga every few months to see how I'm approaching my practice. If I notice that I'm pushing too hard or focusing on form rather than function, I back off the asana and spend more time in meditation.

What are you projecting onto your yoga? Do you think a yoga teacher needs to look a certain way (how would you feel if he/she taught a pose that he/she couldn't do him/herself?)? Do you think that you have to behave, eat, or physically be a certain way if you practice yoga? Are you taking a practice and turning it into a prison?

Something to consider...

Namaste!

December 05, 2010 | Permalink

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